There’s something centring about looking after yourself. Basic self-care. Hygiene and grooming activities. There are things among them that have qualities that can relax and alert us if we are mindful of what we are doing. A couple of posts ago I wrote about mindfulness and the senses in Send in the Senses . Today I would like to show you some of the ways that these principles can be integrated into everyday activities.
Warm water over the skin is relaxing. It’s soothing. You can just stand there under warm water in the shower or sit in a warm bath and let it calm you. (being conscious of your water consumption of course)
Or if you want to you can make it more soothing you can add a scented cleanser and smooth it on with your hands or a soft cloth. Then again – if you want to jazz it up a little, you choose a more uplifting stimulating scent and a courser cloth or a loofah. And okay – so the guys mightn’t be so into the scented soaps as the girls – but the rest still works as well for them even without the scents. On top of that are the sounds of the water and visual stimuli of the water running over you and the shower or lapping against the sides of the bath and the intricacies of your own bathroom and showering routine.
After washing, you think about how you are going to use your towel to dry yourself. Vigorous rubbing will invigorate the senses, while gentle strokes with the towel are likely to be more soothing. Alternately, you might wrap yourself in a towel or terry towelling bathrobe and wander around the house until you dry naturally.
If you’re looking for a basic activity that is inclined to stimulate the senses, then look no further than brushing your teeth. A toothbrush in decent condition with toothpaste on it brushed over the teeth and gums will arouse the senses of touch, taste and smell. Flossing is great if you’re anxious or need to slow down or focus because you have to do it deliberately and if you want to do it properly, you can’t do it quickly – so it forces you to slow down and focus your attention but gives you a task to do it with.
Painting your nails is great for the same reason. There is a need for controlled movement – so you need to slow down and focus your attention. Great for regulating anxiety. It is also something that can make you feel nice after you’ve finished. So nail painting incorporates controlled touch, slow and controlled movement, a stimulating smell – which is not necessarily why you’ve chosen the task – but it won’t put you to sleep. I was stuck in one city while the rest of my family were in another when my Grandfather died and I couldn’t be with them. I was very unwell with depression at the time and quite distressed. In the end, painting my toenails is what I did to calm myself down to a point where I could think reasonably. Then I could start to deal with my situation and emotions more logically.
For those who like a face mask – this is a beauty. Deep touch is relaxing, so you apply the mask with a firm touch. You follow the directions and wait while it sets, then when it is done you rinse it off. Now to rinse it off, follow the directions on the packet but remember: warm water – calming, cool water – alerting; and soft cloth and/or gentle strokes with firm pressure when rinsing will be calming, while a courser cloth and/or more vigorous or uneven strokes while rinsing will be more alerting. My own preference when using a mask is to rinse with a course cloth but gently with firm, smooth strokes in warm water.
If you need to shave, this is a good example of an activity that involves slow, deliberate movement. Focusing on the movement and the sensations of the shaver on the skin can be very effective. Most would find that this would alert touch and movement sensations, potentially smell also depending upon things like shaving creams and so on.
Another one – very touch and movement based that I find therapeutic at time is waxing. Great for anger management. Rip into the leg waxing. It’s systematic. You have to regulate it. You eventually slow down because the waxing process requires you to. But it’s also a useful buffer for stress, a way of alerting the senses to wake up when you’re weary or just getting rid of unwanted hair… Waxing is rich in touch (temperature, pressure etc), it involves controlled movement and you are using your sight to inspect your work.
Brushing or combing your hair can be either relaxing or alerting depending upon how you go about it, although if you use a comb it is more likely that the result will be an alerting sensation. When using a brush however, if one uses long smooth strokes the effect is quite different to brief, sharp strokes. The former is calming, the latter more alerting. Experimenting with different styles of brushing can be a great way to explore ways that touch influences the senses.
Think about all of the self-care activities that you do on a regular basis. Washing and drying yourself, washing your hair, styling your hair, cleaning your teeth, washing your hands, washing your face, moisturising, using deodorant, brushing your hair, shaving and/or waxing, cleaning your ears, dressing, cleaning your nails – anything you can think of … Take some time to think about what sensory qualities there are to the tasks. What movements, use of vision, scents, smells, touch, sounds, tastes are associated with them? How are you positioned for them? Where is your balance? Your centre of gravity? Which of these have alerting qualities? Which have calming ones? Are there qualities to any to the tasks that you do regularly that could be useful to you in other ways?